Infidelity can be traumatic and is one of the more challenging problems faced in a relationship. While many people are blindsided if and when they find out about a spouse or partner cheating, others may suspect infidelity because of actions that are out of the norm.
Consider the following possible signs that your partner is not being faithful. As you can see, some of these signs actually are at odds with one another. This range of possibilities, which is certainly not all-inclusive of everything, shows just how different signs can be from one person to the next.
And realize that while there are certain behavioral changes, curious actions, and odd occurrences that, together, may back up your unfortunate hunch, none of the following definitely indicate your partner is cheating.
Changes in Communication
A breakdown in communication is never a positive sign. If you can’t get your spouse to communicate (or even fight) with you, they no longer share their day with you, or the words “I love you” are no longer spoken, there’s likely an underlying issue.
The following signs of stonewalling, which involves refusing to listen to, respond to, or accept what you’re saying, may also signal infidelity:
- Ignores what you say
- Changes the subject to avoid an uncomfortable topic
- Storms off without a word
- Comes up with reasons why they can’t talk
- Refuses to answer questions
- Makes accusations rather than talking about the current problem
- Uses dismissive body language such as rolling or closing their eyes
- Acts in a passive-aggressive manner (stalling or procrastinating to avoid talking
Appearance and Hobbies
Certainly, taking care of yourself and devoting yourself to new hobbies and passions or even your work can be positive, but when combined with other suspicious behaviors, the following changes may be cause for concern.
- Your spouse is dressing nicer or has a sudden increase in interest in their appearance.
- Your spouse picks up a new hobby that requires a few hours of commitment per day. When you show interest in their new hobby, their answer seems vague or they brush you off.
- Your mate is working longer and longer hours at work.
Your spouse may experience work stress or problems with other relationships that can lead to changes in attitude. The following might be signs of infidelity, but they could also signal other issues.
- Your spouse exhibits signs of low self-esteem.
- You notice your spouse has a sense of confusion about him or herself.
- Your spouse seems to want danger or thrills in their life.
- Your spouse is more negative than before.
- Your spouse becomes more critical of you.
- Your spouse seems to be picking fightsmore often.
- Your spouse gets very defensive if you mention infidelity or affairs.
- When you ask for reassurance about cheating, you do not feel satisfied with the response.
Lying and Avoidance
Dishonesty in a marriage is a red flag. These avoidance strategies may indicate that your spouse may be cheating.
- You feel as if you are being avoided.
- They don’t want to go places or do things with you anymore.
- You find your partner has been lying to you about a variety of things.
- Your spouse’s friends seem anxious around you.
- Your spouse seems more secretive.
- Your partner abandons religious faith.
- Your spouse’s wandering eye seems out of control.
- Your spouse accuses you of cheating on them.
Almost all marriages undergo some kind of financial stress at one time or another. But you may want to investigate certain money issues when you notice them in your marriage.
- You notice charges on credit card statements that don’t make sense.
- Money becomes more of an issuebetween the two of you.
- Your spouse stops planning for large purchases (such as a trip, buying a house, starting a renovation, etc.)